Sometimes I need a brick to the head to get the message. Starting to date a native son of Chicago last month showed both of us how apparent that is. I suppose some internal barriers, like some waiting periods, were meant to be broken.
Recently on Facebook I was tagged with that overly persistent 25 Things meme. What could I write about myself that I haven’t already shared on the blog? About 25 other things, as it turns out.
Life would be easier, certainly happier, if the dating foibles I scribe about on CARLESS weren’t true. As it turns out, they’re so true sometimes these days I feel like the butt of the joke of my own love life.
When you’re a gay man in your late thirties, gone are the days of bashful flirting, banshee sex, and breathless waits for him to call. In their place, the gnawing feeling that you’ll soon resort to calling men at random out of the phone book, yelling into the receiver, ‘You suck!’ One by one by one.
I made eye contact with Benyamin as we entered the happily uncrowded, low-top tabled back room. A smiling Middle Eastern man with a one-word nametag, I knew immediately the Bissell in his hand spelled trouble.
If only our friends and lovers could roll out the same patience we ADDers have to unfurl for them. Talk slower? Write things down? What do you mean we said that already? So what? We’re just trying to make a point! You understand us, don’t you? You are aware our behavior is due to uncommon neurological pathways in our brains and not because we don’t ‘try hard enough,’ right? Didn’t you know all of this came with the territory when you signed on to have an ADDer in your life?
I love walking, but a 15-minute walk to the nearest ‘L’ station? I don’t think so. So why on earth did I almost agree to be roommates with my ex-boyfriend in suburban Oak Park?
I’m willing to bet money the Mad Hatter had Attention Deficit Disorder. Anyone who’s eternally ‘late for a very important date’ definitely has issues with time management, one of the major symptoms of ADD.
When is a neurological disorder a gift? The answer to that depends on whom you ask. If you asked me a few weeks ago, I’d have said never–and why are you asking me such a silly question, anyway?
Last night during the 2008 Studs Terkel Awards at the Chicago Cultural Center, one of the winners, Sylvia Rivera, the general manager of bilingual public radio station Radio Arte, shared this comment from the stage: ‘You write the story of your life. You create your own legend.’ In two sentences, Rivera described my dilemma.